Handling Changes
This morning my daughter called me at 7:45 to tell me to turn on the news. I watched as the World Trade Center collapsed and wondered what the people on those airplanes felt as they flew toward it. My friends Norris called, as I knew she would, fearful for herself and her family. My college-aged sons stayed glued to the TV, only leaving for classes or jobs.
I was their age when President Kennedy was assassinated. I remember watching ever minute of that tragedy. I know my kids must be wondering what will become of their world, what their lives will be like.
I have been dealing with big changes in my life lately and it has been difficult to adjust to those changes. I moved this week from a volunteer job with people that I dearly loved to another job. I miss the people I won’t be seeing anymore so much that I can’t even think about them without wanting to race back to them and the comfortable routine of being with them each Friday.
Then, one of our sons moved home and is taking a semester off. He’s trying to adjust, after and exciting summer working at the Shakespeare Festival, to life without a full time job and hundreds of adoring fans. And for me, working after three years of being “retired” has been a shocker. I’ve gotten so used to being alone, to having huge blocks of time to do my own thing.
Senator Bob Bennett was interviewed this morning on ABD News. He said how this was probably only this one attack by a terrorist group, that this wasn’t the work of an enemy state that was going to follow up with an air force and an army., but that this will affect what we do in our every day lives as Americans forever. It will be hard to make such a tremendous turn around in our lives.
Once, a few years ago we were going through a stressful time. My parents were both very sick and growing older. Clay’s parents were growing older. Several people in our family died within a few years: my two brothers, my grandmother, two uncles, a cousin, my aunt, and several friends. An unusual time of being tested. Then both our parents died within a couple of years of each other.
Things started to pile up in our bedroom. First a box of old pictures from my mom’s and an old lamp I didn’t want to throw away but didn’t know what to do with. Then a box for the DI and some other stuff that needed to go to the basement for storage. Then the Christmas lights and the turkey roaster. Pretty soon, that whole end of the room was covered with boxes and odds and ends piled up on top of each other.
As usual with me, instead of trying to clean things up as I went along, I kept waiting for the big day when I would be able to do everything all at once. Finally my daugheter had to come to the rescue because we were in danger of being swamped and maybe not having any place to sleep anymore. Like those people who hoard newspapers and coupons and have little trails through their living rooms. It got so big that I just couldn’t move it.
The reason was that it is so hard to live in the present and it was particularly hard for me to live in the present during those years. It was almost impossible to believe that my brothers were gone and that my parents had become so sick and old, so I started to ignore the facts and as a result, I ignored other things too. Our lives were such a shambles, what with having little kids and having to race all over the country to take care of people and go to funerals and settle estates, that is was easier to pretend that certain things just weren’t there. Like the junk in the bedroom.
When I heard the news this morning, my first thought was, “Boy, I hope we elected the right guy.” I thought about all the thoughts that went threw my mind as I prepared to vote. All the media hype about hair and make-up and stage presentation at the debates. Whether Al Gore smiled enough, the daily lists of word Bush couldn’t pronounce correctly. What a bunch of junk.
Sometimes we never realize what’s important until we are tested.
I was their age when President Kennedy was assassinated. I remember watching ever minute of that tragedy. I know my kids must be wondering what will become of their world, what their lives will be like.
I have been dealing with big changes in my life lately and it has been difficult to adjust to those changes. I moved this week from a volunteer job with people that I dearly loved to another job. I miss the people I won’t be seeing anymore so much that I can’t even think about them without wanting to race back to them and the comfortable routine of being with them each Friday.
Then, one of our sons moved home and is taking a semester off. He’s trying to adjust, after and exciting summer working at the Shakespeare Festival, to life without a full time job and hundreds of adoring fans. And for me, working after three years of being “retired” has been a shocker. I’ve gotten so used to being alone, to having huge blocks of time to do my own thing.
Senator Bob Bennett was interviewed this morning on ABD News. He said how this was probably only this one attack by a terrorist group, that this wasn’t the work of an enemy state that was going to follow up with an air force and an army., but that this will affect what we do in our every day lives as Americans forever. It will be hard to make such a tremendous turn around in our lives.
Once, a few years ago we were going through a stressful time. My parents were both very sick and growing older. Clay’s parents were growing older. Several people in our family died within a few years: my two brothers, my grandmother, two uncles, a cousin, my aunt, and several friends. An unusual time of being tested. Then both our parents died within a couple of years of each other.
Things started to pile up in our bedroom. First a box of old pictures from my mom’s and an old lamp I didn’t want to throw away but didn’t know what to do with. Then a box for the DI and some other stuff that needed to go to the basement for storage. Then the Christmas lights and the turkey roaster. Pretty soon, that whole end of the room was covered with boxes and odds and ends piled up on top of each other.
As usual with me, instead of trying to clean things up as I went along, I kept waiting for the big day when I would be able to do everything all at once. Finally my daugheter had to come to the rescue because we were in danger of being swamped and maybe not having any place to sleep anymore. Like those people who hoard newspapers and coupons and have little trails through their living rooms. It got so big that I just couldn’t move it.
The reason was that it is so hard to live in the present and it was particularly hard for me to live in the present during those years. It was almost impossible to believe that my brothers were gone and that my parents had become so sick and old, so I started to ignore the facts and as a result, I ignored other things too. Our lives were such a shambles, what with having little kids and having to race all over the country to take care of people and go to funerals and settle estates, that is was easier to pretend that certain things just weren’t there. Like the junk in the bedroom.
When I heard the news this morning, my first thought was, “Boy, I hope we elected the right guy.” I thought about all the thoughts that went threw my mind as I prepared to vote. All the media hype about hair and make-up and stage presentation at the debates. Whether Al Gore smiled enough, the daily lists of word Bush couldn’t pronounce correctly. What a bunch of junk.
Sometimes we never realize what’s important until we are tested.
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